


Temporary and Permanent

by joneinyourarea



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: ALL THE ANGST, Angst, M/M, More angst, Sorry Minho, but not really, happyish ending, new year new jas, v angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-13
Updated: 2019-01-13
Packaged: 2019-10-09 14:03:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17408267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joneinyourarea/pseuds/joneinyourarea
Summary: Jisungs always been a swirl of emotions, not knowing where to go or what to do, but the people in his life help him either for better or worse-lowercase intended





	1. (T)ea

25.10.17

i remember meeting you for the first time; i remember every single detail like the back of my hand, and maybe that's something that i shouldn't be able to do. i should've forgotten all about you, about everything we had-

i should've let you go the day you left.

it hurts knowing that i cared for you, that i care for you still, and that i'll never know how you truly felt before you left me-

what hurts more is that i was a fool, enough to give you everything i had and then some, just to watch you leave-

i'm getting off topic, this stupid journal's supposed to help me get over you, so in order to do that we must start with where it all began-

//

_25.2.2015_

_jisung walks into the cozy coffee shop, face heating up with the warmth from the machines radiating throughout the cramped space. he picks up the unmistakable scent of coffee brewing, hearing the soft whir of the liquid filling the pot up._

_he's stuck on the aroma filling the air, not noticing the line's moved up and that the cashier is looking at him impatiently. his face heats up when he hears a small cough and notices the line in front of him has practically disappeared. he coughs, rubbing the nape of his neck as he shuffles forward and orders a hot chocolate (with extra whipped cream) before stepping to the side._

_which turns out to be a big mistake because as soon as his card makes it back into his wallet he feels the burning sensation of liquid being poured down his front side._

_'ow, fuck'_

_'oh my god, i'm so sorry- did i, did i hurt you?'_

_'it's kind of burning, yeah'_

_the boy, who turns out to be really fucking attractive to jisung (black hair and round almond shaped eyes perfectly framing his slender face, plump lips tying it all together), quickly pulls a water bottle out of his apron and proceeds to dump it all over jisung, cooling the tender skin on his stomach._

_'does it feel any-'_

_'lee minho, what in god's name are you doing to that poor boy-'_

_'i-it's not what it looks like i promise'_

_jisung hides behind the boy, hands gripping at the boy's wrists and tugging them lightly._

_'it looks like you dumped water on a customer'_

_'uh, sir-'_

_the manager, jisung presumes, looks his way with a fire in his eyes like jisung's never seen before. he practically hears the boy gulp._

_'yes, young man'_

_'i- i bumped into him and knocked the hot tea all over myself.'_

_minho looks at him with a look of pure curiosity and maybe a dash of gratefulness._

_'a-and when i told him the hot liquid was burning me, he pulled the water bottle and dumped it on me to try to cool me down-'_

_the manager looks thoughtful, like he's actually debating on whether to believe the story he's been told._

_'is this true, son-'_

_'yes, father. i was trying to cool him down. if you want i can take him to the bathroom and check his abdomen.'_

_'yes, check for any burns. you be careful young man, and minho? ask the person before throwing water on their white shirt.'_

_the manager walks away, huffing and walking out of the building (presumably to the second job his angry mumbles seemed to be about)._

_'hey, thanks for helping me out there....'_

_'jisung, han jisung.'_

_'lee minho'_

_'now what was that about me bumping into you?'_

_'listen- i'll make it up to you okay? we can go out to eat and i'll pay and try my hardest not to spill whatever we get on your shirt'_

_jisung laughs out loud, throwing his head back and taking the boy's hand in his_

_'deal'_

_he leaves the coffee shop with his number in minho's phone and three new messages from an unknown number_

_unknown- hey, is this jisung_   
_unknown- oh, shit i forgot_   
_unknown- this, uh, this is minho- the tea spill boy_

_he pressed the call button, hitting the face time option immediately._

_not even two rings later he was met with the shy smile belonging to one lee minho-_

_'dumb ass, i'm getting free food- do you think i'd give you the wrong number'_

_minho chuckles with a cute goodbye before hanging up._

_he walked home smelling like the vanilla chai tea minho had spilled on him, or maybe it was minho's cologne-_

_he was addicted nonetheless-_

_//_

i want you to know that i never threw the shirt away, it still hangs in the back of my closet, in my secret minho stash that nobody knows i hide.

i hope nobody finds it

i'm not ready to lose you yet, to lose us-

-your sungie


	2. (E)ye rolls

27.10.2017

well, today i was hoping i'd feel better about the whole situation, but surprise! i don't-

i still feel like fucking shit, thanks to you. i wish you had never kissed me, i wish you had never hugged me, i wish you had never asked me on that first date-

i wish-

i wish it wasn't me you bumped into, because then maybe i'd be whole like i was meant to be

//

_27.2.2015_

_jisung hears the knock at the door and watches his mother sprint to open it, not even giving him time to process how shitty he looks for a date or the fact that he'd told his mom he was going on a date, but hadn't even come out to her yet. she opens the door with a buzz, but he hears the hitch in her breath when she catches minho's gaze and realizes that he is not, in fact, a girl._

_the room is dead silent, the tension thick enough to be sliced, but in an instant it's gone and being replaced with his mom's laughter._

_'this is why you were scared to have me open the door sungie'_

_'sungie?'_

_'mom, not in front of my friend'_

_'he's attractive honey, keep this one-'_

_'mom!'_

_'hi mrs. han, i'm lee minho. nice to meet you! i'll take good care of your son, i promise!'_

_'of course, go- shoo, you two have fun'_

_jisung rolls his eyes at his mother's antics, taking minho by the hand and pulling them out of the house_

_-_

_minho takes them to a nice pizza joint, bringing up the point that he works in a coffee shop and can't afford to give jisung the five star three course meal he deserves. he shakes minho's apology off, ordering a pizza with half cheese, ham and pineapples. minho looks at him flabbergasted, and he's wondering what on earth he'd done to make the boy so shocked._

_'make the other half the same'_

_'no, you don't-'_

_'um, yeah- pineapples on pizza is the-'_

_'the best'_

_'-the absolute best'_

_'oh my god, minho, you're amazing and i now love you'_

_-_

_eating the pizza was a whole separate problem because trying to carry the drinks to the table without spilling them was a task in itself and carrying the pizzas proved to be as difficult if not more, but they made it to the table in just enough time to set the dish down and stuff their faces._

_minho brings up the idea of  hitting up an ice cream parlour on the way back to jisung's house and jisung can't turn down ice cream, ever, so he immediately agrees._

_-_

_he's shocked when he feels something cold hit his face, the burning sensation coming back in an opposite effect. he looks up to find a smirking minho, spoon in hand and ice cream preparing to be launched a second time._

_he pouts because god damn it that's chocolate ice cream, and this is his favourite white shirt, his number one favourite._

_the anger subsides when minho accidentally whacks him straight in the forehead and lets out a small giggle, looking away when jisung comes to meet his eyes. maybe it was his favourite shirt, so what-_

_maybe there were supposed to be memories that were made and if the shirt had to be sacrificed to hear minho's laugh, well then-_

_maybe it was worth it to ruin two of his favourite shirts in three days._

_maybe he didn't know it then, but he was falling for minho (and the latter was doing the same, falling even harder)._

_-_

_being walked home was the worst part of the date, because that meant he'd have to say goodbye to minho and he wasn't ready for that._

_but like all good things, they must come to an end at some point, no matter how disappointing it is._

_he feels minho tug on his sleeve to get his attention._

_'i liked this. maybe we could- do it again?'_

_'of course, hyung!'_

_he can see minho leaning in for a kiss and he leans in as well, but right before minho's lips brush his he can hear a loud crash in his house (followed by his mom's cursing, 'fuck- way to go jooyoung, you messed up your kid's_ _first_ _kiss you idiot')_

_//_

you were everything i wanted you to be and so much more, that date-

that date was everything i could've ever dreamed of.

except, it was missing a kiss-

but that comes later doesn't it baby?

-your sungie


	3. (M)orning dew

9.11.17

it's really hard to forget everything we had, trying to erase your memory burns in the back of my mind-

you  burn in the back of my mind, unforgotten (which is exactly the opposite of what i'm trying to make of you).

i was told it's less painful forgetting someone who left over time, but fuck you still haunt me min-

everything i do reminds me of you and i can't handle the thought of seeing someone who isn't here wherever i go.

you left, you're gone-

you're not coming back and it fucking hurts.

moving on hurts, how did chan do it when you left him for me?

how could anyone move on from the one person they love

min-

i miss you even more every goddamn day.

halloween just passed a few days ago, i remember our first halloween together.

i'd give anything to just go back to that day

because then i'd get more time with you-

//

_31.10.15_

_jisung wakes up to the sound of minho's giggles, peaking his eyes open and looking across the room he sees the brunette hair sticking up every which way (and still looking as cute as ever). he can clearly see a pink headband with cat ears  resting perfectly against the top of his head, his hair gently tucking the bright pink band almost enough so it can't be seen (almost). he's got on black skinny jeans and converse and this stupid pink sweater that swallows him up whole (giving him sweater paws but jisung can't admit to staring_ _, even though he knows his boyfriend of three weeks has caught him_ _). it should look stupid and immature, but minho rocks it._

_not only does he rock those goddamn cat ears, but jisung can see him hop off the chair he's perched on and crawl over to his bed (climbing on and curling next to him, hands winding around his waist). he smiles, pulls minho closer and peppers kisses all over his face waiting for the melody of minho's laughter to subside so he can peck his lips._

_minho's not having any of jisung's pecking games though, when he connects their lips he feels minho's hands snake in his hair. he feels lightheaded, giddy, and he doesn't know if it's because it's halloween or if it's because he can taste his favourite candy on minho's lips (and feel minho's smirk knowing he has this affect on jisung)._

_-_

_'come on ji- you can't look that bad'_

_'says you! you're literally a fucking cat'_

_'you're literally a fucking dog, now get out here so we can go'_

_'fucking fine, but if we see people our age i'm hiding behind a tree'_

_'babe-'_

_'don't fucking use that tone with me minho, that's the jisung can't say no to this tone'_

_'you caught me, but seriously don't be a baby. come on you don't even look bad babe.'_

_'and how do you know that minho-'_

_'it's literally jeans, a grey sweater and a headband, get the fuck out here and let me kiss you'_

_'bitch, why didn't you fucking say so sooner'_

_//_

min-

i have your headband stashed in my nightstand drawer, right next to-

well, i don't want to say it, because it hurts to much.

why minnie? why?

what the fuck even happened to you? you just disappeared without a trace.

baby-

i'm holding out faith that one day you'll come back to me. i know you love me just as much as i love you.

until then, i'll wait for you. nobody will ever come between us.

-your baby ji


End file.
